> My unseen sins

~~Tuesday, August 21, 2007~~

7:33 PM

State it clear.

What with the irresponsible and selfish of him being in a relationship with me while he still loves his ex-girlfriend? Me having a low self value to accept him though knowing he still loves his ex-girlfriend?? What are you trying to say arh?? I know how I feel. Jealousy and to think that he took me to just forget his ex-girlfriend. But to think again,I myself do actually miss my precious ex-boyfriend. What for do I have to be jealous and such?? I ever did that mistake once,being with this one guy just to forget my ex-boyfriend and to kill those pain. But it was a mistake. It dosen't affect to me only,but to the partner itself too. I heard his pain before. I know my mistake dearly. I even had enough of hurting others. And I do have my own self value. Fuck your words! And I know Nat isn't being irresponsible and selfish. You don't even know whats going on and yet just point out the un-fact.

Patience?? I have my patient limit. As long as he don't fool around with me and faking his love towards me,then that shall be fine. And as far as I concern that he is sincere and faithful in this relationship,which then goes to me too. And I know that I trusted him and I know that I love him deep in my heart.

Ex-girlfriend,ex-boyfriend. They are the precious people in our life in the past. They taught us alot. They bring wonderful memories. And I know to the certain extent that its not wrong to miss somone we used to love dearly before. And I know that I can't stop the person from forgetting the past as I myself can't forget that precious person too. If you understand yourself,then you will know how to understand the other partner. Therefor I shall say,its not being fair or unfair but to understand each other well. And I'm not worried about him missing his ex-girlfriend. 'Cause nothing last forever and I know we won't last forever. There's always an end towards everything,even your life.

And I'm wondering why you nameless creatures have to bring this matter up? Do you even know me and Nat well? Well enough that you can actually state your point in our relationship without having your rights and wrongs. I don't want to get things worse. I'm just stating my own point of view. And I wonder who you guys are. Why don't you just put your own name? Ashamed if you actually point us in a wrong way? Or your name is actually "nil". And to passerby,I may not know if you are actually a passerby or not but then how come you can actually know what the situation is all about? What if you actually point it out in a wrong way? If only you are a passerby then think again. If not,then you and that person called "nil" can live under on roof. In malay,"korang boleh duduk satu bumbung larh deii!"

And I'm done speaking my mind out. To my dearest Nat,like I used to say,come what may. For I know that I really do love you. Till then..

.I Wrote This Shit.